THE MAN IN THE MOON

If you have read any of my blogs, in fact if you are faithful and loyal enough to read them then you are probably holding your breath right now wondering if this is just another blog about L-O-V-E. Not exactly. This blog is actually going to deal with the more technical and physical side of relationships. Okay, get your minds out of the gutter. It is not going to be X-rated. It is not even going to be PG-13. However, this blog will deal with teen angst and wide-eyed innocence when exploring the topic of kissing. Kissing? So what's the big deal? Well, if you've never kissed someone there is a lot of planning and practicing that goes into making your "first kiss" worth remembering.

Life can be quite simple when your a child, but once you start noticing the opposite sex life can get quite complicated and exciting. It is a rush. In the movie, "The Man in the Moon", where Reese Witherspoon had her film debut, there is a scene between two sisters who share their fears about growing up and even the technicalities of kissing a boy for the very first time.

Maureen: "Do you remember when we were little and Mama used to tell us when things get all mixed up all you have to do is tell The Man in the Moon?"

Dani: "Yeah, you just had to keep on talking until you were sure you told him everything so that he had all the pieces. Just like a puzzle."

Maureen: "And then he'd work out the puzzle for you while you were asleep."

Dani: "Yeah, but that was kid's stuff Maureen. We're too old for make believe."

Maureen: "Yeah, I know".

It's funny how Dani is the fourteen year old girl and Maureen is the seventeen year old girl in this scenario.

Dani: "Maureen? What's it like to kiss a boy?"

Maureen: "It depends on the boy. You talking about anybody in particular?"

Dani: "I was just asking a question. Can't anybody ask a question around here?"

Maureen: "For starters, you let him kiss you if you like him. If you don't like him, just tell him that you're not that kind of a girl."

Dani: "What if you like him alot?"

Maureen: "Then you won't have to think about it. It will all come to you."

Dani: "You're not telling me anything. I need to know what to do."

Maureen: "Ok. Come on. First you'll kind of have to tilt your head to one side that's so you won't bump noses."

Dani: "Ok".

Maureen: "Would you loosen up. He's going to think you're scared of him. Ok, then kind of open your mouth just a little".

Dani: "Uh-uh". (Spoken like a true fourteen year old, well at least back in the 1950's which was the setting for this movie).

Sadly, nowadays kids are losing their virginity at fourteen instead of receiving their first kiss.

Maureen: "You wanted to know how. I'm telling you how. Look, practice on your hand, okay? That's it just keep practicing."

Dani: "Well, what if I forget what to do?"

Maureen: "Just do what you feel".

Dani: "If I do what I feel, I'll burst in a million pieces and go flying out into space".

Maureen: "That sounds to me like a good way not to get kissed twice".

Dani: "Maureen? Have you ever liked somebody so much it almost made you sick? It's like my stomach ties up in knots and I can't breathe and sometimes I think I'm going to throw up."

Maureen: "Well don't throw up, Dani. Whatever you do don't throw up."

Eventually, Dani did get her kiss and she didn't throw up. The scene between Dani and Court takes place down by the pond where they first met.

Dani: "I want you to be the first boy to ever kiss me."

Court: "I thought you said, you've been kissed so many times."(He leans down and kisses her gently which is appropriate for a seventeen year old boy kissing a fourteen year old girl.) "How was that?"

Dani: "Perfect."

Honesty is so refreshing. Here is one of my favorite scenes ever of Dawson's Creek because at its core the show was about sweaty palms and innocence. Dawson, played by James Van Der Beek approaches his dad played by John Wesley Shipp about the "mechanics of kissing".

Dawson: "Um I have a question. It's kind of a girl/relationship question and I don't want it to go to your head that I'm soliciting fatherly advice or anything. But I clearly don't condone yours and mom's perverse sex life. But I'm not too proud to admit that my own inexperience is hindering my current female relations."

Mitch: "Well, what's the question?"

Dawson: "Mechanics of kissing."

Mitch: "How can I help?"

Dawson: "Well, I'm interested in technique."

Mitch: "Well, there is no technique Dawson. You just put your lips together and go".

Dawson: "Yeah, but what makes a good kiss?"

Mitch: "The first time I kissed your mother and we were out on a boat and your mother's lips were chapped from the sun and she asked me if she could borrow my chapstick so I took it out and I put some on my lips and then I leaned over and kissed her. The chapstick was really smooth and just slid onto her lips. The sensation was amazing. I mean, the chemistry was already there, you know? But this was just one of those things that cemented it. It was unforgettable and most of all it was romantic. It's all about the romance. And Chapstick".

As Dawson and his dad were discussing the "mechanics of kissing", Joey played by Katie Holmes was climbing up the ladder into Dawson's bedroom. If you know anything about Dawson's Creek, you know that "the ladder" is very significant. She walks through the room and hears Dawson and his dad talking downstairs in the living room. She kneels down and puts her hands around the rails of the banister and leans her head between the middle of them, eavesdropping on their very private and personal conversation. Joey has quite a crush on Dawson so this is a conversation that she is very interested in because she has daydreamed for quite sometime about Dawson kissing her. The only obstacle being that Dawson is thinking about kissing his girlfriend, Jen from New York City that Joey, small town girl cannot possibly compete with so she thinks.

Dawson: "But the kiss itself? What did you do?"

Mitch: "Well here give it a try."

This is the part in which the writers did such a fantastic job. Mitch Leery, Dawson's father picked up a head that was fashioned to look like Joey because it was kind of her "stunt double" when she got her pretend head chopped off during Dawson's scary film, "Sea Creatures from the Deep".

Dawson: "No."

Mitch: "Well come on this is a big father-son moment here."

Dawson: "You asked for it."

Mitch: "All right."

Dawson: "All right".

Mitch: "Now moisten your lips. And go for it".

Dawson: "Dad this is ridiculous".

Mitch: "Wait the trick is, it's your bottom lip you've got to keep it relaxed, all right? You...want to let it have a mind of its own. You want it to dance with hers."

Dawson: "Okay."

Mitch: "Close your eyes".

Dawson leaned down and kissed the doll's head's lips as unbeknownst to Dawson Joey watched from afar and closed her eyes instinctively imagining that Dawson was really kissing her.

Mitch: "That was good."

Dawson: "Yeah?"

Mitch: "Yeah."

Dawson: "Cool. Um...forget this ever happened?"

Mitch: "All right."

Dawson: "Thanks."

Then at the end of Season One the big moment presented itself and Dawson finally did kiss his best friend Joey.

Joey:"Dawson I am so tired of dancing around these big words. I just want to be honest with you."

Dawson: "Joe, more than anything I just want to be honest."

Joey: "You think we're ready for that honesty?"

Dawson: "Yeah I do."

Joey: "Are you sure? Because honesty is a big word and it changes things and it complicates things. Are you sure you're ready for everything that goes along with telling the truth?"

Dawson hesiates and Joey searches his eyes.

Joey: "I'll see ya Dawson."

Dawson: "Joey. Joey"

Then they kiss as the camera makes it's way out of his bedroom into a wider shot where all you see is the silhouettes of Dawson and Joey with their arms wrapped around each other and their lips locked together. Season Two begins the same way because as we all know "a kiss" is usually just the beginning and real feelings get involved. After that first kiss, things start to change, and an emotional attachment ensues. Dawson described this kiss between he and Joey to Pacey as Pacey was about to embark on his own romance with Andie, which was one of my favorite pairings of the entire series. Dawson said, "It was the sweetest most romantic, 4th of July firework-y,waves crashing on the shore beyond any movie I could ever imagine kiss." Now that is some kiss.The next day Joey has a talk with her sister, Bessie about the first kiss and the agonizing and overanalyzing that goes into the anticipation of being kissed again.

Bessie: "Hi What are you doing here?"

Joey: "Nothing. Just thinking about tonight."

Bessie: "Oh the date. This will be interesting. Hey, what's wrong?"

Joey: "I don't know it just seems weird. I mean Dawson and I on a date? Doesn't that seem weird to you?"

Bessie: "Well, was it weird when you kissed?"

Joey: "No, no that--that felt pretty right. But the thing is it hasn't happened since and that was yesterday."

Bessie: "Well, that's not unusual. The way I see it the second kiss is always tougher than the first one."

Joey: "We actually kissed more than once that night."

Bessie: "Yeah, but it only counts as one. And that first kiss? It's the passionate one. It's the one fueled by desire, and attraction and all that. But the second kiss is rational. You've got time to think about it to worry and overanalyze. Most women they prefer that first kiss, but I'm partial to the second one because it's about something more. You'll get that second kiss Joey and when you do it'll be great. It'll be real. It'll be wonderful".

I've never really thought about it like that. It is a very interesting perspective. I just know that the second kiss is alot easier because you just kind of sink into it. It becomes something more than worrying about the technicalities of bumping noses and how to move your head or even making your bottom lip dance.

Then comes those agonizing drought periods where you aren't being kissed. In Season Three of Dawson's Creek, Joey is going through one of these frustrating drought periods. The scene takes place at a carnival between Joey and Jack who interestingly enough Joey used to date before he realized he was attracted to the same sex. I always liked their dynamic.

Jack: "Where were you?"

Joey: "None of you business".

Jack: "Lost in X-rated thought? Come on tell me."

Joey: "Okay, but promise you won't laugh. I was thinking about...kisses."

Jack starts laughing.

Joey: "Forget it."

Jack: "No, no it just sounds funny coming from the girl who decided to throw away relationships while in pursuit of her true self."

Joey: "I know. Sometimes, I'm sorry I ever said that. I mean...but I'm being honest with you to the point of utter humiliation...I miss the kissing part and I like to think I'll get kissed again before the millenium comes and goes".

Jack: "It'll happen." (Jack sees a physic booth set up in the distance.) In the meantime, why don't we find out when that elusive next kiss is going to find its way to your lips?"

Fastforwarding to Season Four, Dawson was leaving the next day to go to film school. The moment was so overwhelming that Dawson and Joey kissed for the first time in a long while. Joey was talking about her all time most life-altering moment and she said it was when Dawson decided to kiss her. She said, "It's a pretty powerful thing when you get your biggest wish in one moment". For her assignment the next fall at the beginning of Season Five, she decided to write a story about that kiss entitled "The Kiss". Professor Wilder was reading it to the class. This scene picks up in the middle of the story.

"And then just like that, they were kissing. She didn't know how they got there. She had no idea. The thought of kissing this boy hadn't crossed her mind in years which was weird because once upon a time that was all she ever thought about. And then, just like that it was over. He coughed. She shuffled her feet. And she laughed to herself. It had been one of those moments. One of those moments when you shuck your status as mere mortal and achieve however briefly, true greatness. She had shared many such moments with this boy. But now, He was leaving and nothing would ever be the same again."

Let us rewind to Season Two for a moment. Dawson was struggling with the possibility of his parents separating. He and Joey had not been dating for very long and they were sitting on the roof of his house.

Dawson: "Hey look up in the sky. What do you see?"

Joey: "The moon?"

Dawson: "No, no Look at the moon. Now close your eyes. Now what do you see? It's the man."

Joey: "Who?"

Dawson: "It's the man, remember?"

Joey: Oh right--right--right--right. The Man in the Moon. I get it. But wait."

Dawson: "What?"

Joey: "It's not a man, Dawson. It's a woman."

I sure do miss the playfulness and the sillyness. I am a grown-up as much as I protested. It is just comforting to think back to when things were simple like that. When we believed in magic and "The Man in the Moon". In the movie, "The Man in the Moon, Dani told Maureen she wished that she could still talk to the man. Someone once said, "It's the good girls who keep diaries, the bad girls never have the time."I am definitely one of the good girls, like Joey. I have journals that chronicle the big moments in my life such as my very first kiss. I can just close my eyes and envision it. As scared as I was back then, it was a moment that I will always remember. He definitely made it a memorable even though he wasn't wearing any chapstick.

Sometimes, guys don't have any more of a clue than "The Man in the Moon" when it comes to a girls' feelings about them, kissing, and romance. So I thought that it would be interesting to take the journey of the kiss because once a kiss lands on your lips it is only just the beginning, which begs the question, "Is it the kiss itself that is so important or the journey of the kiss?" In cinematic terms, a kiss at least with the right person is definitely the climax, but the journey of the kiss is what builds up the excitement, the drama, and the anticipation in which every single time we hope for a happy ending. At least I hope for a happy ending. A kiss is an outward expression of inward feelings that starts in the pit of your stomach producing gargantuan butterflies and if you are really lucky finds its way into your heart. After all as Alberto Carlos Campos once said, "I feel worthy of every kiss I laid upon you for in each of them went part of my heart." As Mitch Leery said to Dawson, "It's all about the romance." Just ask "The Man in the Moon."